


Teacher

by tornyourdress



Category: British Comedy RPF, Have I Got News For You RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:20:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24445729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tornyourdress/pseuds/tornyourdress
Summary: Julian's taught him everything he knows about how to flirt with men.
Relationships: Julian Clary/Paul Merton
Kudos: 5





	Teacher

Julian taught him everything he knows. Strange, that. Julian’s younger than him – only by a couple of years, but he’s been around. He knows all the tricks. Paul supposes it’s not fair to say that Julian taught him _everything_. After all, anyone can give a blow-job. Anyone can fuck or be fucked. 

But not everyone can do it _well_. And that’s where Julian gets the credit. Julian, after all, is entirely comfortable with his sexuality. He’s as gay as Christmas and he doesn’t care who knows. He’ll announce it to anyone and everyone. Hell, he usually does. He is quite possibly the campest person Paul knows. And Paul knows a hell of a lot of gay men, most of whom take pride in their campness. 

He’s not as easy for Paul. He’d be out there, mincing along with the best of them, if he were gay. If it was that simple. But he likes women too – his wedding ring is a testament to that fact – and so it isn’t. He can’t throw himself entirely into the homosexual lifestyle. The last thing he needs is women flocking towards him asking him for advice on shoes or hairstyles or whatever it is and then getting outraged if he tries to make a pass at them. 

Besides, his fashion sense isn’t good enough. That’s according to Julian, of course, who is hardly the most sedate dresser in the world. 

Julian taught him how to flirt with men. He does, far too often. People usually think he’s joking. But the ones who are interested – they pick up on all the right signals. And then he can have his wicked way with them. It’s the way he works. The life he’s chosen, not quite fitting into one group or another, but knowing enough to get what he wants, whenever he desires another man. 

And then of course there’s always Julian himself, who, despite the disapproval regarding Paul’s fashion sense or lack thereof, will never say no. After all, the teacher must examine his disciple every now and again, to ensure that the lessons have been learned properly.


End file.
